Because I knew you, I have been changed for good...

Front page of the paper this morning

Yesterday was Graduation Day!  Graduation day is my favorite day of the year.  As I was standing in the tunnel with my students, I told my principal it was like our Superbowl. I was wrong.  It is like the ticker-tape parade after your most favorite team in the world has won.  The parade isn't just amazing for the team in the parade, but also for the fans that show up, dress up, and get the honor of celebrating with the team they have stood by through seasons of trials-successes and failures-laughter and tears.  Graduation day is my favorite day of the year.

I have attended a lot of graduations--five as a high school teacher--and therefore I have heard plenty of commencement speeches.  I have favorites (Aaron Harris) and I have some that I wish were shorter (not gonna tell), but they mostly have a similar feel to them.  Welcome, funny joke about how boring commencement speakers are, story about life, and finally advice to the graduates.  I couldn't sleep last night, and as my mind wandered I replayed some of the advice that had been given during these speeches.  Most of it was useful, some of it was not, but what would the students (my people) take away from all the wisdom bestowed upon them?  If I could talk to them, one more time, what would I tell them?  I realized I would not give them any advice at all (for my students who read this, it won't surprise you that I'm not gonna give you any answers).  Instead, I would want us to think about what we had figured out on our journey together--what they learned from the entirety of the journey.  I have truly cherished being a teacher to the class of 2014 because I have learned so much and received so many lessons from being a participant in their journey.  So, class of 2014, I cherish you, and here is a list of some of the things I have learned from you this year:

1. Participate: When I first started teaching, I thought I could just stand back and be separate from my students lives.  I was wrong.  Students, thank you for including me in your lives inside and outside of the classroom.  The amazing stuff only happens when you are a part of the stuff, which then makes it amazing. In our classroom, everything that worked worked because you were involved and took part of the process.  Each time a new voice added something to our work it was
like a small gift for the entire community.  Don't forget this as you move into more unfamiliar territory.  Be a part of stuff.  Don't be afraid because you are in a new place.  Some of you expressed the fact that when you first came into our classroom you were nervous.  You will be nervous in the next place. Share your awesomeness, get involved, be a part of it.  You have a lot to give.


2. Laughter is its own Reward: Oh my goodness, have we laughed this year.  We laughed at ourselves intentionally and we laughed when things didn't go so right.  We laughed a lot when I said something that ended up sounding unintentionally inappropriate!  Some days, the laughter was the learning.  Those are the days I will remember!  As you journey on, find laughter in the large and small things.  When you feel like you just can't even, giggle because you sound like one of "those girls" and figure out that you can.

3. Take Risks: I can't count how many times I said to you, "We are going to try something new today, and
I'm not exactly sure how its going to go."  But we went.  And we weren't afraid to say, honestly, this isn't really working.  What was lost?  More is learned from risking and not exactly succeeding.  We worked together to make things work.  If we needed to, we abandoned ship.  We started over..  When I first started teaching I thought every single day had to be perfect.  Oops!  Now I know every single day needs to be filled with communication and understanding and a willingness to try new things.  Don't forget how much you learned when things didn't go as planned.  Sometimes the best learning and the most important memories are made when you risk and don't succeed.  Remember that you will get where you need to be, even if you are not exactly sure where that is.

4. Help Each Other: Some of you may think I mean for my students to ask for help on their school work, but that's not really it.  I learned from you that it is okay to ask for help from each other without shame.  I
watched a student share a very painful story with another student, and I was terrified.  Why would he share this with her?  What is she going to do?  More than I could ever have done, she reached out, and helped him make his story better, and along the way became his friend and confidant.  She never judged, never made him feel awkward, she just helped him.  I was reminded that help comes in many different forms.  Sometimes
it is the person who refuses to throw you the lifesaver, but stands beside you and cheers you on that is the most helpful.  Students you reminded me that it is not only critical to ask, but that understand that help can be offered in so many different ways.  When you are willing to expand your view of what help is, you will find it in the most unexpected places.  And then you will find a way to laugh (see number 2) and your life will be so much richer and better.

5. Show Gratitude: I mean, I know we all feel it, but this year I have learned how important it is to SHOW it!  I watched as students talked to each other about what they appreciated about the people they were working with.  I watched as the people who received the compliments did not quite know what to do at first, but I watched as our community grew so much stronger.  I am not sure I have properly thanked you, class of 2014, for letting me in.  Thank you for blessing me with laughter and selfies and Catch Phrase and honest writing and terrible writing that we made better.  Thank you for lending your voices to enable all of us to benefit.  Thank you for trusting me and listening to me and for reading and exploring with me.  I love you!

So, now you know why I will never be a commencement speaker.  First of all, my emotions tend to leak out of my eyes, and I may or may not cry a lot. People may think I cry simply because I am sad.  That is completely untrue.  I cry mostly because I am overwhelmed with pride and I am so thankful that I got to be a part of someones journey.  Secondly, I will never be an expert at anything.  I am not sure I find a lot of value in knowing what the right answer is.  I love the journey to find new answers.  Finally, I don't really have any advice, I just love the people.  One last time, class of 2014, thank you from the bottom of my heart.  I am looking forward to seeing what amazing things you have in store for you.