2014: A Year I will forever CHERISH

CHERISH: [cher-ish] verb (used with object)
1.to hold or treat as dear; feel love for: to cherish one's native land.
2.to care for tenderly; nurture: to cherish a child.
3.to cling fondly or inveterately to: to cherish a memory
 
Last Christmas break, I was up early, watching the Today show-like I love to do over breaks, and I saw a man talking about New Year's resolutions.  I love New Year's resolutions.  I am a frequent maker, breaker, and reflector of resolutions.  However, this man had a different idea, and one that I found intriguing. Instead of choosing a resolution or 20, how about focusing on one word?  Choose one word and focus on that word over the course of one year.  I loved this idea!  I decided I would try it for myself and share it with my students.  I agonized over my word choice.  I chose the word "Cherish."  I dedicated myself to focusing on this word, including writing a blog (my goal was at least once a month) to force myself to focus on something I cherish.  Well, it is one-year later.  This is my 41st blog post.  I have tried, at least twice a month to sit down at my computer and think about what I cherish.  However, this idea has extended far beyond this blog.  I find myself, when I am in a difficult situation, trying to figure out what I might take out of this experience to cherish.  Cherish does not mean simply to love.  It is an ongoing action, it is holding near, continuing to care for, it is never ending.  Even when an experience or object or person is no longer within our immediate grasp, "cherish," means that we hold the impression of the experiences with us.  I had no idea going into 2014 how incredibly significant that would be for me, as during the year I would transition many things in my life.  My word of intention gave me perspective that gone does not mean gone-it means irrevocably imprinted and altered.  

In order to close my year of "cherish" I want to reflect on just a few of the things I have cherished this year.  

1. My family: This year, my dad was treated for throat cancer.  During his treatment, as a result of the chemotherapy, he had a heart attack and other very significant health issues.  Due to ongoing issues, he has trouble eating and now takes most of his nutrition through a tube in his stomach.  While this was happening, my mom lost her mother, my last grandparent.  Finally, my son graduated high school and moved out of our home to begin his own journey in college.  I have often been terrible about taking my family for granted.  I have gone long stretches of time without speaking to some members of my family.  I always thought family somehow linked to big gatherings or special occasions.  I was wrong.  I cherish the time my sister and I sat with my dad at the chemotherapy clinic, in silence, all of us simply being there for each other.  I cherish the fact that both of my children and my husband turned up at clinics, hospitals, or wherever, not because they wanted to do something for anyone; they just wanted to be there.  I cherish the road trip I took with my son and my nephews to Iowa for my grandma's funeral, laughing and playing stupid games and eating Chick-Fil-A together.  I cherish the laughter through the tears and taking stupid selfies in ICU waiting areas and hotels outside of funeral homes.  I cherish the times when I called my son up, just to say hi, or when I heard his car pull into the driveway because he needed something and then he stayed to chat for a little while.  I have learned to cherish family in a new way.  Through all of this, my husband, son and daughter stood near when I needed, and stepped away when I needed, and showered me with graciousness I will never be able to be thankful enough for.

2. My friendships: Last night I sat on my phone, and sent texts to many people who have become dear to me in my life.  Cherish again means that I don't need to see someone every day, I don't need to do anything, but I need to recognize and value the imprint so many people have made in my life.  This year, I have tried to be sure that I say, "I love you," more than ever-because I want to be sure the people whom I cherish understand that they don't have to do anything to be significant.  Dear friends, thank you--without you I'm not sure who I would be without such generosity and patience.  I know I am a very difficult person sometimes, but true friendship has softened me, allowed me to laugh at myself, and showed me that it is not weak to admit you need someone, in fact, some of the greatest strength I have found in myself is when I leaned on you, borrowed strength, and emerged an alloy of my own strength and the strength you selflessly shared with me.  

3. My career:  I often joke that I don't like calling teaching a job, because it seems to lessen what teaching means to me.  In classroom C-203, I have learned to cherish the people, the ideas, the smells and sights and messiness of becoming a family each year.  The rigor of learning and exploring is incredible.  The ability to communicate and read and write and think critically about difficult things is work that makes each person in our room better.  The fact that this is my work, and that my work is my dearest passion--I'm probably never ever gonna be able to stop pinching myself that this is real.  If you are or have been a member of my C-203 family, or an adult person in charge of one of my "kids" please know that I can never express how much I cherish the generosity and openness that only occurs because of the willingness we have to engage in the messy, challenging work of learning each day.

So, thinking back, 2014 has been filled with challenges.  However, I know that my "one-word" resolution was a success.  I am already thinking about my word for 2015.  I can't wait for school to start on Tuesday so I can talk to my students, and share with them my new word and ask them to consider choosing a word.  I promise I will blog what that word will be, but that may be the end of this blog journey.  I am not sure where 2015 is going, but I anticipate it will be filled with change and things to cherish and challenge and I look forward to continuing to my journey.  Happy New Year dear friends!

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